“Where are you?” ask both my readers.
Where am I? Well today I was looking at the tiny roses blooming down by the beach on this grey, blustery winter day – in awe, once more of this coastal winter, so different from winters I was used to in the east. I mean, ROSES? In January? I stood on the beach looking across the Strait at nothing but grey as low clouds covered all views of Lasqueti and Texada islands and the coastal mountains of the mainland. As I did, suddenly the sun behind me pushed its way through the clouds and I stood in a lone patch of sunlight, confirming my belief that Qualicum Beach has its own private climate and perhaps so do I. Back in the day, when I lived in Ottawa, my greatest ambition was to spend the entire month of January in the house, never setting foot outside. How things change.
The other part of the answer probably has to do with the fact that I don’t take many pictures these days, for the ‘this is getting old’ reasons I’ve been whining about this past year, so enough of that. But since I started writing this or the earlier blogs going on nine years ago, for me, it’s all about the images as well as the words and a big part of the inspiration. Now that I’m creating images in another way, my time seems to be spent on crafting paint or charcoal rather than crafting words.
So speaking of inspiration, prodded by the Christmas letters I’ve been reading over the holidays, thinking back on this past year, I’ve been wondering what indeed have I been doing? I realize with surprise that it was just last January we went on our trip to New Zealand (feels like a lot longer). We were planning to go to Rome for a few weeks this coming year but the Pope has totally ruined our plans by declaring the year a “Jubilee Year” which sounds like something important as they are expecting an additional 5 million tourists visiting Rome this year. I won’t be one of them.
This past fall I went on a solo (“How Can I Miss You if You Won’t Go Away”) trip to Ontario visiting both Toronto and Ottawa for a couple of weeks in November. In Toronto I hung out with Maristella for a few days exploring her new neighbourhood, as well as with Number 2 Son Mike, who moved there this past year. He spends most of his time in the Arctic, in Cambridge Bay where the government is constructing a scientific research station.
Lawren Harris – Pic Island
I also spent a few days on my own making several trips to the Art Gallery of Ontario to see the exhibition from Tate Britain “J.M.W. Turner: Painting Set Fee” and all the other goodies in this fantastic place. The new AGO is a complete delight. Completely rebuilt by the architect Frank Gehry some years ago who opened it up to the streets around it in a spectacular way, it had an energy to it that was far more than a place to go and look at pretty things. (Or eat and drink in their terrific bar and restaurant – hear that, Ottawa National Gallery? They have a BAR and a great restaurant – pull your finger out!). There were small tours happening, lots of people going into the featured exhibition, art students sketching classical sculpture, or sitting on the floor in groups drawing from Lawren Harris paintings. Speaking of which, the room full of his paintings was a place I went back to more than once – I’ve always had a thing for his abstraction, my (only) favourite of the Group of Seven. The building inside and out is its own work of art and is the most accessible gallery I’ve yet to see (and I’ve lots more to see yet). I love the place.
My time alone mid town, walking the old ‘hood, turned out to have the feel of a archaeological memory dig. I lived in Toronto for 12 years but it’s been decades since I really spent much time there other than traveling there for business for a decade of endless soul slurping meetings, where once in awhile we’d be let out for an hour or two. So it was quite an adventure to have the time and space (and mindset) to walk around and witness so much change. Every now and then I’d be able to pick out old landmarks still visible. I stood at the corner of Bloor and Yonge looking upward at the highrise concrete all around, stretching forever, with another monster building going up on the southeast corner, totally transforming what was. I could barely recall what it used to be, and then that memory soon vanished. Bits and pieces returned to mind of my life there so long ago. Snippets of images of people I used to know came to me – a conversation, or something we did, brief memories of people, some of whom I haven’ t even thought of in a million years.
Approaching Yonge & Bloor c.1970
When I moved to Toronto in 1969 (from Montreal) the population was 2 and a half million – now it is 6 million. When I wasn’t walking, I was riding the subway and street cars, traveling here and there, watching the people around me. I heard more Tagalog being spoken around me than I have since I left Manila! 200,000 Filipinos make their home there.
Leaving Toronto, I took the train to Ottawa on a cloudy November day, watching the Way More Than 50 Shades of Grey landscape rolling by. This, too felt familiar; I’ve made that trip many times in years past (often returning shellshocked from aforesaid meetings from hell). The November landscape also reminded me of winter’s approach. Still, the train trip was so relaxing and friends and family were ahead so it was all good. Not all memories are stellar but it was part of the trip to replace old ones with the new, or if not replace, to put them in the ring and let them duke it out.
In Ottawa Number 1 Son Steve drove me around to check things out. For the most part, not much change was apparent, that is, until we hit The Old ‘Hood. My my my. It’s been 8 and a half years since I left and the entire neighbourhood is completely transformed. When we moved into our brand new house in our brand new sub-division in the far southwest corner of Ottawa, we were one of the first in. We watched as the construction filled in the lots around us but only a 5 minute walk got you to country roads and farmer’s fields and wooded river banks. I used to walk all over the place with not a soul around, even one day seeing a coyote cross my path – both of us startled, then he continued on his way loping across the fields. I’d sit beside the riverbank in the shade of the overhanging trees and daydream.
It’s all vanished. All of it. That quiet road at the entrance to the subdivision that you’d cross to reach the fields – it’s now a traffic calming circle. I just roared with laughter at the sight! I’m sure my mouth hung open in astonishment through the entire drive through. All those fields are now covered with houses. For miles and miles (or kilo-whatevers) in all directions, thousands and thousands of new families. It’s all gone. Even the riverbend where I used to hang out – the banks have been totally cleared of all those summer shade giving trees. Clear cut. As a matter of fact, it looks to me like the river has been altered in some way. Nothing there now – just a glimpse of water as you drive by on the way to the mall.
Down that quiet road that led from our subdivision to the town of Manotick (that same road with all the intersections and traffic circles, there was a large patch of land that was what was left of an apple orchard, where you could buy apples and fresh cider for a few weeks in the fall. It’s gone too now, everything razed to the ground in preparation for, yes, another new sub-division. The name of this new community-to-be? Wait for it. THE ORCHARD!
I enjoyed seeing the changes, as weird as they are, and I don’t feel at all nostalgic for what was. What is, is. Even our old house has changed – there was a For Sale sign up on it so I looked at the MLS photos on line to see all the changes they made – new counters, new built-ins, that sort of thing. Looks good. They also completely removed the garden we enjoyed so much creating – oh well it’s all compost in the end anyway.
The nice thing about memory is you have it (until you don’t). They can destroy the old neighbourhood’s rural landscape and clear cut the riverbed in real time, but I can still go there, all those years ago, in memory. Anytime I wish.