I woke up yesterday morning to what was at first a puzzling sight. Instead of the usual blue sky and sunshine, a golden glow was seeping through the blinds. Dennis and I got up and went outside where we found an amazing, and beautiful sight, something new for me, a sky that was completely orange, casting its magic on the lighter tones of the garden.

A little later, I went down to the beach to see what there was to see out in the open, looking across to the mainland. Here’s what I saw…

Beautiful and frightening. Hundreds of forest fires burning in British Columbia. The day remained overcast – occasionally you could glimpse an orange sun through the haze.

Last night we visited neighbors down the street and sat outside in their garden. By the time we left the smell of smoke had descended and I had started to sniffle and sneeze. Back home I shut all the windows.

This morning the sight is decidedly not a beautiful one. Again overcast, the air is noticeably smokey and the smell of burn is very strong. A layer of ash covers the garden furniture. Down at the beach you can’t see across to the mainland at all, it is all smoke and haze. In addition to the large fires across the Strait on the mainland, fires are also burning here on the island, including one about half an hour’s drive away near Port Alberni. The first fire fighter has succumbed – fire has claimed the life of a tree faller battling the blaze across on the Sunshine Coast.

Four years ago today I arrived from Manila, coming “home” after living in Asia for 4 years. I had timed my arrival carefully, as I wanted to be sitting in my waterfront home away from home in Victoria, Haro House, looking across the water to the U.S. San Juan Island, to watch the July 4th fireworks – little pops in the distance, but still, borrowing those festivities to celebrate my arrival, finally, to Vancouver Island.

I just re-read a few of the blog posts I made at the time, July 2011, including a post explaining how we ended up in Vancouver Island on this piece of geography (Where It All Began). The excitement and happiness I felt at that time continues to this day. This felt like home long before I ever arrived to live here permanently.

I’ve always believed that this year July 4th would be significant as it marks the day when we have lived on our island home as long as we lived in Asia. Still, I really don’t know if 4 years feels like a long time or a short time. My sense of time is wobbly.

But forget all that. This is a significant day for another reason.There is a lot to celebrate today, as well, as this 4th of July our neighbors (well many of them) can find pride and joy in the fact that recently their Supreme Court has finally determined that all Americans can marry whoever they love, and all that this implies for rights and respect for all. They join 17 other countries, including ours, that have now recognized same-sex marriage. Congratulations.

Now there is one thing I can tell you: you will enjoy certain pleasures you would not fathom now. When you still had your mother you often thought of the days when you would have her no longer. Now you will often think of days past when you had her. When you are used to this horrible thing that they will forever be cast into the past, then you will gently feel her revive, returning to take her place, her entire place, beside you. At the present time, this is not yet possible. Let yourself be inert, wait till the incomprehensible power … that has broken you restores you a little, I say a little, for henceforth you will always keep something broken about you. Tell yourself this, too, for it is a kind of pleasure to know that you will never love less, that you will never be consoled, that you will constantly remember more and more.

Marcel Proust

Killing me softly with his song.