The return from Burma was a bumpy landing and no fault of the pilots. The problem was all inside my head, she might have said.

When I got home in February after more than 3 intense weeks in Burma I had a hard time recognizing it as “home”. While it was definitely nice to see Dennis and sleep in my own bed and commune with my GreenHouse, it was, at the same time disorienting. More than once I woke in the middle of the night and looked around at the window, at the doors, and didn’t know where I was. I couldn’t recognize my own house, let alone my own home.

The town seemed out of place. The quality of the light was, to my eyes, off. Sleep deprived and no doubt semi-psychotic I wailed “What the f@*# am I doing here?” to my friend in an email. Her reply was calming, pointing out that clearly I was in a dark place, it was also winter in Canada but summer was on its way – the equivalent of “This too shall pass”, one of my favorite expressions. When I was able to walk again, after my toe, damaged from walking 12,000 miles around Hong Kong on our day-long layover, healed, I’d walk appreciatively breathing the completely fresh air, oohing and ahhing over the giant trees in the forest or the view from the beach, thinking, this isn’t so bad, for somewhere that isn’t home.

Now, a couple of months later, I’m no longer sleep-deprived, the days are longer, spring is definitely here, we have new friends and I’m happily busy in the garden, or, when it rains, scratching my head over a pile of electrical equipment and 2 miniature projects, trying to figure out how I’m going to figure out how to put them together, creating lighting inside the projects. But a number of things have happened lately that are making me think more about “home” and where it may be.

The first year in our house was difficult in many ways. The acre and a half property adjacent to ours had been sold to a developer who subdivided it into three lots and built a house a few feet beside ours, raising the elevation of the land to about 5 feet above ours. I could say “towering above us” because that’s what it feels like, with the house, its panel fence and, if that’s not enough, the parked RV blocking the morning light into my GreenHouse and turning my outdoor Summer GreenHouse, the fuchsia shade house at the side of the house, into a cave and generally destroying my peace of mind. This after being forced to watch the destruction of 30 huge trees on the property and putting up with the constant noise of heavy earth-moving equipment and house construction for months and months. We’re by no means the first people to be affected by an in-fill, but that doesn’t make it any easier. I no longer walk or drive down that end of the road, I can’t stand to look at it. When a couple of weeks ago we heard of another proposal to remove all the trees and brush on the lot adjacent to the other side of our property, wiping out those huge old cedars and destroying the habitat of the birds and wildlife we watch and enjoy, I had a melt-down. Despite loving the house and Bunkie and all the renovations to house and garden we’ve put in, for the first time moving was on the table. Which raises the question of where to go? Stay in the neighborhood? Stay in the town? Move somewhere else? If so, where?

The second event was the arrival of house (Bunkie) guests who were on the Island on a search for a city or a town or a neighborhood to move to, when they retire soon. As I listened to the talk of the pro’s and con’s of this or that place it made me think of the things I like about this town and this part of the world. List:

• Geography – mountains, forests, ocean all right THERE
• Fresh air
• Not many people
• Mild and short winters
• Killer gardening
• Easy travel to Vancouver by ferry or by car to Victoria, two of my favorite cities
• Great road trips around Vancouver Island and beyond
• Fantastic food – seafood and market gardens just down the road, fresh fresh fresh
• Friendly, small town vibe
• Creativity – everyone seems to be an artist of one kind or another, inspired no doubt by the environment, leisure time and the art of others
• Sailing – I’m adding this in for Howard, I’m still ambivalent, after my near-death  (just kidding) experience last summer
• Did I mention mountains, forests and oceans?

In my life (so far) I’ve lived in 4 countries*, 9 cities**, countless neighborhoods, apartments and cities. It’s no wonder that after a year and change, a short time really, I’m still finding my way. No doubt home will eventually find me.

* Canada, Jamaica, United States, Philippines

**Montreal, Toronto, London (Ontario), Kingston Jamaica, Ridgewood New Jersey, Washington, Ottawa, Manila, Qualicum Beach